Acceptance
by nestofdreams
Summary: Unforeseen circumstances lead to emotional turmoil for one, Albus Potter. They open his eyes to what has always been right in front of him and he realizes that in the end, all he can do is accept the inevitable and let it happen.


"…and then she said 'yes'! Albus, she actually said yes!"

Albus stares at Scorpius as if he's never seen him before. He takes in the aristocratic features – the high cheekbones, pointed chin and sharp nose. The blonde hair, so fair that it is almost white. It is soft too. So very soft – and silky. Scorpius' eyes, probably Albus' favourite thing about him actually, are lovely grey, like the clouds after a heavy storm – mellow, soft. Now they are filled with excitement and triumph and they glitter like the most beautiful of stars.

But then again, Scorpius has always reminded him of stars – beautiful but unattainable.

"Albus, are you alright?" Scorpius' face has lost its wide grin and those eyes are now muted with concern.

Albus forces a smile on to his face. "I was just caught off guard there for a bit, mate. It's not every day my best friend, the super geek manages to land a date. With my cousin no less!" He claps Scorpius on the back. "That's brilliant Scorpius! I'm so happy for you."

The smile is back on Scorpius' face and _it_ is brilliant. "Thanks Albus." He sighs happily. "I actually have a date with Rose Granger-Weasley. See, I told you pity was a start."

"Forgive me for not believing you before. I should have seen it a mile away." Truthfully, Albus hadn't seen it coming. No matter how much Scorpius had nattered on about his long term plan to wear down Rose's defences, asking her out over and over again until she accepted ("It's inevitable Albus," he'd said), he'd never believed that it would actually work.

"That's alright. It does one good to say 'I told you so' once in a while. Keeps your self-esteem high."

"Oh, I think your self-esteem is doing quite alright as it is, _Scorpion King_." Albus says teasingly.

Scorpius laughs. "You know us Malfoys. It's all about confidence." He suddenly casts a _tempus_. "Albus, shite! We'll be late for Potions. Hurry!"

Scorpius takes off down the corridor like a boy possessed and Albus follows, though at a much more sedated pace. He's rather busy wondering actually.

Wondering how he's never realized he is in love with his best friend.

OoOoO

Albus attaches the letter to his owl's leg and smiles as he watches Helio fly away. He's just sent a letter off to his dad. They've owl _-_ ed frequently for the past few months and Albus feels as if the whole mess back in September was worth it if it brought them to an understanding. He's found that he and his dad share much more in common than he'd initially thought. Unlike James and Lily, they both prefer the quiet company of their closest friends, Scorpius for him and his aunt and uncle for his dad. He's found that his dad is a pretty good confidante too and that telling him things, even in letters comforts him.

Of course, this whole mess with Scorpius is just too insane to bring up and he doesn't know how his dad will react. It's not just for the fact that he is a Malfoy, but he is a _boy_ , and Albus has always liked girls. When he thinks about it though, even when he'd had an infatuation with Delphi (thinking about her now makes him recoil in disgust), he wonders if it was nothing more than gratitude for someone who wanted to be his friend (no matter the reasons).

He sighs as he leaves the Owlery. However, as he rounds the entrance he instantly smacks into someone coming up the stairs. He reaches out at once to steady the someone, who turns out to be Rose.

"Honestly Albus," Rose huffs as she gets her balance back. "Are you trying to kill me?"

Albus doesn't say anything and tries to move past her to head down, but she suddenly steps in front of him.

"Are you alright?" she asks with uncharacteristic concern.

"M'fine." Albus tries to get past again but she places a restraining hand on his arm. He sighs. "What?"

Rose looks torn for a minute, biting her lip indecisively. Finally she takes a breath as if to steel herself. "Listen Albus, I know we haven't been on the best of terms these past few years."

"You think?" It comes out louder and harsher than he's intended, and he feels not a small amount of satisfaction when Rose visibly flinches.

"I suppose I deserved that," she says somewhat stiffly. She composes herself again. "Anyways, I've been thinking and I want us to go back to how we were before."

"Before Hogwarts you mean? Before I was sorted into Slytherin. Or do you mean before Scorpius?" Realization hits him. "Scorpius put you up to this, didn't he? He asked you to play nice with me."

Rose looks affronted. "As a matter of fact, he didn't. I simply thought that since he and I will be going out now…"

Albus feels sick.

"… and you're his best friend. We three will probably be hanging out a lot now."

Albus doesn't say anything to that. The mere thought of the three of them 'hanging out' leaves him with a bitter taste in his mouth.

"And Albus, even though you probably won't believe me, I _am_ sorry." Rose continues, looking genuinely apologetic. "We were close once. You were my best friend, and I shouldn't have treated you the way I did."

Albus can't stand her earnest expression for another second and quickly turns back into the Owlery. Rose comes in after him.

"And so what? It took you almost four years to realize this?" Albus rounds on her. "That first year, it would have been nice to have you on my side. If it hadn't been for Scorpius, I probably couldn't have made it through."

"Albus, what do you want me to do?" Rose snaps. "I can't go back and change what happened, even if we _do_ have a time-turner available. All I can do now is say I'm sorry and ask if we could be friends again."

Albus regards her coldly. "You know what? I don't think we were ever friends to begin with. Friends don't abandon you when you really need them." He turns to go out again. "One thing though, hurt Scorpius, and I honestly don't know what I might do."

He leaves her there, standing with a look of utter disbelief on her face and perhaps a hint of fear as well. He's smiling grimly to himself as he walks back to the castle.

OoOoO

"What did you say to Rose?"

Albus opens his eyes and raises himself to sit up as Scorpius comes stalking towards him. The sun makes his hair more golden than white and it gives him a distinctly angelic look. Though right now he looks more like an avenging angel, what with the fierce frown on his face and lowered brows.

Albus glances out at the Lake. The water is smooth and the light breeze makes the smallest of ripples on the surface. He turns back to Scorpius who is standing above him, arms crossed in displeasure. He looks rather like his dad actually.

"You're going to have to be more specific. I'm sure I've said a lot of things to Rose in my lifetime." Albus finally says, not caring that he's pretty much adding oil to fire here.

Scorpius doesn't look amused. "Albus, I know that you know that I know that you know _exactly_ what I am talking about, so let's not beat around the bush here."

"Okay hold on a sec while I sort out all the 'I know, you know's." Albus knows he is stalling but he can't help it. It isn't everyday Scorpius gets angry. It's more like never actually. He's about the most easy-going person Albus knows.

"Albus!"

"Okay fine. You're referring to our conversation in the Owlery?"

Scorpius sits down on the grass beside him. "She said she wanted to speak to you and I knew you were in the Owlery. You send a letter to your dad every Friday after all. I was on my way back to the common room when I ran into her in the corridor. She looked like she'd been crying actually." He looks at Albus accusingly.

Albus at least has the decency to feel a twinge of guilt at that. It's not every day Rose cries.

"She wouldn't tell me what happened." Scorpius continues. "So once again I ask, what did you say to her?"

"Nothing that wasn't true!" Albus bursts out and Scorpius looks taken aback.

"Albus…"

"You know what she wanted? She wanted to suddenly be my friend again. As if she hasn't spent the last five years pretending she didn't know me. That I was an embarrassment. You know she didn't speak to me even once at the family Easter party, except to say 'move aside Albus' when I was standing in a doorway." He gives a bitter laugh. "Just because you're willing to forgive and forget doesn't mean I am. Unlike you, I don't want to snog her so I suppose I have no incentive to be nice to her."

"That was a horrible thing to say, Albus Severus." Scorpius says in a quiet voice.

Albus shrugs indifferently. "I'm fine with you dating her…" The thought makes him feel like he's being torn in half actually. "…but that doesn't mean _I_ have to play nice."

Scorpius stares at him quietly for a few moments before getting up and heading back to the castle. "I'll see you at dinner, I suppose." he says, without turning around and then he is gone, leaving Albus to stare out at the Lake. Who knows, maybe he'll finally see the elusive giant squid.

OoOoO

Albus is walking back to the common room with Scorpius. The night before, they'd made up for their fight, with them both apologizing. Albus for being unforgiving and insensitive, and Scorpius for not understanding how badly Albus had felt about Rose's abandonment. They're the best of friends again and Albus was even polite to Rose when she came over to sit with them that morning in the courtyard.

"It's okay Albus." she'd said when he'd offered her a stiff apology. "What you said was also true."

Then the conversation had moved on to where Scorpius and Rose were going to go on their date this afternoon. Rose likes to plan things out, quite like Aunt Hermione actually. At that point Albus had claimed that he had a headache and needed to see Madame Pomfrey for a pain potion. Scorpius had hardly even looked up except to say "I hope you get better soon", before turning back to Rose with adoring eyes. Albus had felt an actual headache blooming and really went to the hospital wing in the end.

Now he is trying not to sick up at the thought that Scorpius is about to go out on a date in less than an hour. That he'll be in Hogsmeade, probably hand in hand with Rose as they wander from shop to shop. Maybe they'll even kiss. Since his epiphany yesterday, Albus has wondered what it would be like to kiss Scorpius. How those surprisingly full, pale pink lips would feel against his own chapped ones. His dad told him it was something he'd inherited from him, the constantly dry lips. Of course now he'll never know. Scorpius will kiss Rose and Albus will try not to burst into embarrassing sobs if they ever do it in front of him.

"You know, I'm rather nervous now." Scorpius confides as they enter the common room and head for the dorms. Thankfully they find their room empty. The others are probably out watching the Quidditch practices.

"I may have seemed all confident back there with Rose." He continues, rummaging through his trunk now. "But the truth of the matter is, it's all an act. I may in fact be rather terrified."

"You've nothing to be afraid of Scorpius." Albus says as comfortingly as he can. "She's going to love the date and she's going to love you."

 _I_ _know_ _I_ _already_ _do_.

Scorpius laughs shakily. "Love might be a bit too soon. I just hope she doesn't regret saying yes."

 _She'd have to be an idiot to do that._

Scorpius pulls out a pair of dark jeans and a green jumper. He quickly shrugs out of his clothes and standing only in pants he turns back to Albus.

Albus feels as if he'll combust on the spot. He's seen Scorpius like this before, after all they live in a dorm and it isn't strange to see their dorm mates in varying states of undress. Albus always used to joke that Scorpius was so pale he made him look tanned. Unlike James, he's actually quite pale, but then his dad's told him that he too was like that at this age so he doesn't take it too seriously. And Scorpius is pale. A beautiful, creamy pale – he practically glows.

Yes, Albus had seen Scorpius like this before. But not since he's realized he loves him.

"I wasn't sure about what I should wear." Scorpius says, thankfully pulling on his jeans, though it's a small comfort as now Albus is drooling over how those long, slender legs look in them. "But I figured, I'll go for casual but not _too_ casual, you know?"

"What are you going to do about your hair?" Albus asks, lounging on his bed now.

Scorpius smoothens down his jumper before responding. "I'm just going to leave it like this. It looks fine right?"

Albus stares at the silken locks. "It looks…" _beautiful_ "…fine."

"Well then," Scorpius looks nervous but excited also. "I'll be off now, wish me –"

Albus springs up and wraps his arms around his friend, holding him tight. It's a sweet agony to feel the lithe body against his own, to feel his heat, the sweet scent of Scorpius washing over him. They've hugged quite a lot this year actually, but Albus plans on this being the last one. He can't deal with it anymore.

When he lets go, he's satisfied.

Scorpius looks extremely flustered for some reason. "Um… what was that for?"

Albus tries to laugh it off. "I know we were supposed to quit with the hugging, but think of that as a good luck hug."

"Alright." Scorpius nods. "Well… I'll be – I'll be going now then." He walks out of the room, though he gives Albus a strange backward glance. Albus is usually good at reading his friend's expressions, but this one has him stumped. It is an expression he's never seen on his face before.

With Scorpius gone, Albus wonders what he should do. He thinks for a moment that a walk around the Lake would be nice, but as he walks to the door he feels himself trembling. Eventually it gets so bad he has to sit down. He collapses on to his bed and raises a shaky hand to wipe at eyes that are beginning to fill with embarrassing tears. Honestly, he's too old to cry.

The tears don't stop though and soon he's soaking his pillow with them. He's glad the dorm is empty but just to be safe, he manages to close his curtains and cast a _muffliato_ on them.

And then he cries.

He cries because he's been so stupid and blind to his own feelings. He cries because he's a horrible person who can't even be happy for his best friends' triumph. And he cries because he knows that now he truly is alone at Hogwarts for Scorpius has a girlfriend now, and Albus cannot fit into that picture. But it's alright. He's used to being the one who's always left out, the one who blends into the background.

The loser.

OoOoO

When Albus awakens, it's to someone crawling into his bed. He scrambles for his wand at once, fumbling in the darkness.

"Albus, calm down. It's only me."

Relief floods through him at the familiar voice. He's found his wand now and casts a _lumos_. Scorpius has climbed in beside him but the curtains are still closed. He can't hear anything beyond them so he figures the dorm is still empty.

"Scorpius, you're back. Gosh, how long did I sleep? What time is it?"

"It's dinnertime actually." Scorpius replies, settling with his back to the headrest. Albus also sits up. "I wasn't hungry so I came up. Was wondering where you were too. Why'd you go to bed so early anyways?"

 _Because crying into your pillows can be quite exhausting._

Out loud, he says, "I had nothing better to do and must have fallen asleep while I was wondering what I could do until you got back." Albus smiles. It sounds pathetic but it's also something that is believable when it comes to him.

"Oh," is all Scorpius says in return.

There is a silence and Albus wonders why Scorpius looks so pensive. He's about to ask but then Scorpius suddenly turns to him, his eyes narrowing.

"You've been crying." It's more of a statement than a question. He raises a hand to place on one of his cheeks, rubbing at the tear streaks that have dried on them. "Why were you crying? Did someone do something while I was gone?" He looks angry now. "Listen Albus, I may be a pacifist by nature but don't forget I'm also a Malfoy. If someone's been messing with you, I'll deal with them. My dad has some rather interesting books about hexes in the library, and I'm sure he could lend them to me or give me some hexes himself."

That sweet, kind, patient Scorpius is busily plotting the untimely demises of non-existent bullies, his face taking on a rather Slytherin look actually, makes Albus want to start blubbering again. He wonders what he could have done to deserve such an amazing friend.

"Scorpius, calm down mate." Albus laughs, reaching up and taking his hand off his cheek. "There weren't any bullies. I probably had a bad dream while I was asleep and started blubbering away like a baby." The lie comes easily to him.

Scorpius seems to buy the lie and doesn't ask any further. Albus realizes that they're still holding hands and quickly lets go, returning his hand to his lap.

"So… how'd the date go?" He knows he has to ask this question. It's a necessity of being a best friend. Much to his surprise though, Scorpius face falls when he asks it.

"Didn't it – didn't it go well?" Albus can hardly believe this. Could Rose actually be that stupid, to let such a good thing go? Speaking of which, he's glad she isn't anywhere near or he'd probably do something stupid.

Scorpius gives a short laugh. "Oh no, it went brilliantly actually. Better than I'd thought it would. We met at the gate and received a lot of strange looks. Must have been weird to see the great Rose Granger-Weasley going to Hogsmeade with Voldemort's child."

"They still –?"

Scorpius cuts him off. "That was a joke Albus. Ever since your dad made that big speech, no one's brought up the rumour since. Speaking of which, I really must thank him the next time I see him. I think my dad was so happy he tried to do something stupid like kiss him or something, but whenever I try to ask about it he quickly changes the subject. Highly suspicious if you ask me but –"

"Scorpius, you were saying?" Albus should really just let Scorpius ramble. In all truth, the idea of their dads kissing – fantastical, will never happen and would probably traumatize anyone around if they did – is still preferable to hearing about the date.

Scorpius looks sombre again. "Oh yeah. So we set off and almost before we'd even stepped through the gates, Rose was holding my hand. Quite surreal I can tell you."

Albus clenches his fists into his covers.

"We walked around Hogsmeade for a bit, mostly window shopping. We did go into Honeydukes though and I brought back some chocolate frogs for us to open later on. I swear this batch will have a Harry Potter card. I can feel it in my almost always correct gut."

"I can always give you mine." Albus has probably said this a million times and already knows what Scorpius will say in return.

"But it won't be the _same._ "

They both share a laugh and then Scorpius begins again.

"Then we went for tea at Madam Puddifoot's." He grimaces now. "Yeah, the cakes were good but the atmosphere was…" He waves his hand in the air as if searching for a word. "Let's just say it was not somewhere I'd want to go to again. Plus it was only full of couples and some of them were doing things they really shouldn't do in public. I mean honestly, do they think we can't see what their hands are doing under the table? The table cloth doesn't even cover more than an inch below the table top!"

Albus listens enraptured. Even though what Scorpius is talking about is not something pleasing, Albus has always loved listening to him tell stories. There's something so enchanting about the way he recounts, interrupting himself constantly to add his own take on the situation, even if the situation doesn't involve him at all.

"After that, we walked over to the Shrieking shack. I really don't know why she wanted to go there, and after meeting Snape in the alternate reality, I wasn't too keen on visiting the place of his death. Then we came back." He ends abruptly and Albus knows he's hiding something. Scorpius is quite a good liar actually, but Albus has always been able to see through him.

"Well... it looks like it turned out great!" Albus strives to sound enthusiastic. "So I take it, it's official now? You'll go on more dates. You're her – her boyfriend." He can't stop his voice from breaking at that last word.

Scorpius looks up from where he's been studying the bedcovers. "No." He says only this word and then there's a pause and it feels like energy is crackling around them.

"No?" Albus has no idea what Scorpius means.

"No." he repeats this and now he's much closer than before. Even by the dim light of his _lumos_ , Scorpius is so close that he can see each individual fair eyelash, every pale freckle on his nose that he claims his dad has too, though Mr Malfoy says differently.

"No," Scorpius says for the third time. "We aren't official, there will be no further dates and I am _not_ her boyfriend and will never be."

'Wha…"

"And do you want to know why Albus?" Scorpius is smiling now but it's slightly wild and his eyes are wide. "Want to know why I turned down the girl I've been going after for years? On our first date no less."

Albus nods, trying to slowly inch away from Scorpius, who is beginning to scare him now. He can't move anymore though or he'll fall off the bed. The curtains are oppressing now and Albus feels suffocated. Why hasn't dinner finished yet? He needs air, other people.

"It's pretty simple actually." Scorpius pauses as if for dramatic effect. "It's all your fault."

Now Albus is extremely confused.

"Why did you hug me before I left? When you did that, you must have cursed me or something."

"What? Of course I didn't!" Albus says indignantly. He's just about ready to throw him out of his curtains.

"It was a joke. Somewhat. Well, I _know_ you didn't actually curse me, but you did bewitch me." Scorpius says plainly with a shrug.

"I'm finding it rather hard to follow you."

"Well let's see. Throughout the whole date, I was extremely distracted. Rose had to pull my attention to her an embarrassing number of times. She even literally pulled my head around to face her since I was apparently staring off into space. Now, the reason I was distracted was because for some inexplicable reason, I kept thinking about _you_." He looks at Albus accusingly.

Albus really has no idea what is happening now.

"I kept wondering about what you were up to. Wondering if you were bored, lonely, in trouble. And I kept wondering why you'd hugged me and _looked_ at me… the way you did." He is blushing now and it's a beautiful thing to see. A pretty pink flushing those pale cheeks and neck.

"And then we went to the Shrieking shack and you know what happened? Rose kissed me. On the lips, her hands in my hair, body pressed against my front. You know that was my first kiss and let me tell you, I don't know where Rose got all that experience, but she shows as much prowess in kissing as she does in everything else she does."

Albus feels himself trembling again and he can't breathe. Why is Scorpius doing this? Telling him every little detail of their apparently fantastic first kiss. He obviously enjoyed it tremendously. Well Albus hadn't enjoyed _his_ first kiss. It had been with his aunt after all, though at least it hadn't been his own lips. Still, is Scorpius trying to rub it in?

Albus really needs air. He tries to turn away. To open the curtains. Get off the bed away from Scorpius. Anything so he can breathe again. And now he feels his eyes welling up again. He can't do this here, not in front of him.

But Scorpius won't let him go. As Albus turns away, Scorpius grabs his hand and that simple touch freezes Albus to the spot.

" _Please._ " Albus isn't ashamed that he's begging. Isn't ashamed that he's trembling and tears are running down his cheek. Doesn't care that even an idiot can tell why he's crying, and Scorpius is no idiot.

"Shh, Albus." Scorpius croons, his other hand reaching up to push Albus' hair away from his forehead. He rubs his cheeks, soaking up the tears and then lightly traces his trembling lips with his finger. Everywhere he touches feels like it's burning up.

"The strange thing is, even though the kiss was everything a boy could wish for, _I didn't like it._ " Scorpius closes his eyes for a moment. "The moment she placed her lips on mine, I froze. I wanted to kiss back but I couldn't. It felt so _wrong._ I ended up pushing her off like a berk and I almost fell on my arse in my haste to put some distance between us. She was very understanding about it actually. Said she'd expected as much and had said 'yes' to show me that I was pursuing the wrong person."

The flood of relief that floods Albus scares him with its intensity. He sags against the headrest, trying to get his breathing back to normal.

Scorpius is looking at him again and he has that same look he had before he'd left on his date. And he's so close now, closer than they've ever been before, Albus thinks.

Scorpius' voice has lowered to a whisper now, and Albus detects the slightest of trembles in it. "On the way back to the castle, we didn't talk much. But my thoughts were whirring. I kept wondering if something was wrong with me for not liking the kiss. Maybe I was broken? And then I thought about what she'd said, 'the wrong person'. So I thought who'd be the right person then? Who would I want to kiss?" He pauses for a moment, his eyes clear and searching Albus' own for something.

"I thought of lots of the pretty girls in school, including Polly Chapman. Then for another inexplicable reason, I thought of you. And now all I can think of is how much I want to kiss you, Albus."

And then he does, and Albus gives a decidedly unmasculine squeak. But he doesn't care, because Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy, _is_ _kissing him_.

Scorpius' hands curl into his hair, holding him in place as he ravishes his mouth. Albus really has nothing to compare this to but he has a feeling this is no run of the mill, kiss-for-the-sake-of-kissing kiss. This is a _kiss._

It's full of passion and yearning and unvoiced feelings. Years of friendship and love. And it feels like Scorpius is trying to claim him, to brand him. Well, consider Albus claimed.

Albus doesn't know what to do. He clutches at the front of Scorpius' jumper and tries to mimic his movements. Eventually he gives up and just lets Scorpius do as he pleases. Scorpius may never have kissed before, but really the boy was _made_ to kiss. His lips are soft and moist, and when Albus is forced to let out a small moan, he uses it to slip his tongue in. Scorpius tastes of chocolates and tea and something that Albus instantly categorizes as 'Scorpius' taste' in his head.

Eventually, the need for air forces Scorpius to stop plundering Albus' mouth for a minute. He pulls back, panting and flushed in a way that Albus has never seen before. Albus himself feels breathless and slumps against Scorpius.

Scorpius suddenly begins to laugh. "Well…" and his voice is thick. "That was certainly something I liked."

Albus finds himself beginning to laugh too and soon the two of them are clutching each other and laughing like hyenas

"Come on," Scorpius opens the curtains and Albus blinks at the sudden light. It isn't bright but it still makes him squint for a minute. The room is _still_ empty. "We're going to see if there's any dinner left and if there isn't, my dad told me how to get into the kitchen. After that, we're going to change into our pajamas and go to bed. Tonight I'm sleeping in your bed by the way."

"Wait so I'm to sleep in your bed then?"

Scorpius snorts. "No, silly. I'll be sleeping in your bed _with_ you."

Albus flushes at his stupidity and also the idea of sharing a bed with his… boyfriend? Lover? They can work out the details later.

"But won't the others think it's weird?" he asks.

Scorpius waves his hand dismissively. "I'll close my own bed curtains so they'll think I'm in there, and then I'll sneak into yours when they aren't looking. Or I can use your invisibility cloak. You still have it right?"

Albus nods dumbly, wondering at the unexpected turn of events.

"Good, then let's be off." Scorpius pulls Albus' hand and they make their way out of the dorm. People give them weird looks as they pass the common room, probably because of the fact that they are still holding hands. Scorpius doesn't seem to care though so Albus doesn't either. They exit the common room and start up the stairs, still hand in hand. It feels so _right_.

Albus has no idea what will happen next. How the rest of the school will react. How his family will react. He plans to send an owl to his dad the next day anyways. Yes, he doesn't know what the future holds in store for him but if his one and only adventure has thought him anything, it's that what they do in the past affects the future in unfathomable ways. As long as he's with Scorpius, he knows that his future will be bright.

 _Fin_


End file.
